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What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

It may seen stupid but what would you do?

well today after class I was waiting for my BF to pick me up and while I was waiting a guy came up to me and asked if he could use my cell to make a call. I know I forget my cell and ask others if I could use theirs if it's an emergency. Happen twice my whole life. So I said sureSmiley Happy well as he made a call he turned around and some how I got the feeling a faked the call by the way he was talking. "Not sure" well and hour later I get a text from this guy saying I was beautiful and he was to shy to talk to me and thanked me for letting him use my phone. I told him no problem and thank youSmiley Happy then he said  he hopes to see me around some time and told me his name. ( I thin realized as he walked away he had some high school football sweats on from the same HS as me. I was a cheerleader. Wich explains why he looked familiar to me and why I let him use my phone that was out in the open.) well I did nicely say if he sees me around maybe we can chat while on break but that I did have a BF. The convo went something like that sorry gals. But then he called me 3times at 3dif times. i didn't mention it to my BF because I didn't want him to get upset or think get jealous fast. I have no friends so meeting new people at school and just having a chat is nice you know.. But I think this guy might think different and I don't want to be mean. after all I'm pretty sure we went to the same high school and know similar people. I just don't want to assume anything and be like.. Sorry I can't talk to you I have a BF. I don't even know if I make any seance at all... Hahaaaa..

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I think it's super-creepy that he tricked you into giving him your number instead of outright asking for it. Shy or no, that's weird. I would say, "Thanks! I have a boyfriend but a pretty friend can't hurt, right?" If his messages or contact or conversation remain inappropriate or veer into sabotaging your relationship, I'd tell him that you need him to stop contacting you because you already told him you had a boyfriend. Of course, that is if you want to be friends with him, maybe. If not, I'd simply say, "Thanks! My boyfriend seems to think so, as well. Smiley Happy "

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Yeah I guess it was pretty creepy huh.. I'm not sure if I should not reply at all.. I'm kinda nervous to answer the phone calls... Lol but what if I run into him and it's all awkward hahaa 

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

When you see him, tell him you're sorry you didn't get back to him but you and your boyfriend were busy and you didn't have time to chat. 

 

And frankly, I'd tell your boyfriend. If you're serious enough to have been dating for 3 1/2 years, you hopefully trust each other. Tell him that some guy borrowed your phone and has contacted you 3 times and it's making you feel weird. Ask him as a guy what the easiest way to tell a guy you're taken and not interested might be. Sometimes guys can be the best source of advice about guys. 

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

^ What Mafan said!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

EXACTLY what Mafan said!!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Wait... "calls" - as in more than one unanswered call after he sent you a text? Unless you invited him to call you or responded in the text in a way that indicated you wanted more conversation, this is a major, major red flag. Taking a phone and getting the number off of it and then pressuring a woman is a tactic in the "pick up" playbook - guys who use sleezy pressure techniques to sleep with women, often women in relationships so that they don't have to worry about relationships. A single text message from a young-ish guy who may not know that what he did was creepy is one thing - multiple calls to someone you scammed out of their phone number? Sounds like something less innocent. 

 

(Edit: Ah, I see. The original posted ended with "wich" when I saw it - looks like you had a premature posting issue and edited in the rest. I think it's super-creepy how he is handling this *and* if he recognized you from high school, he should say, "Hey, didn't we go to high school together? I think I remember you!" not feel like you owe him your time because he recognizes you.)

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I agree - if he wanted your number he should have just asked for it. It's not that hard lol.

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I think what I'm trying to say is I don't want to assume every guy that wants to talk to me likes me in anyways. I've met some pretty cool guys at school before and it's only been about a friendship. However, I have met some guys that were pretty out of line and kept pushing me to spend time with them even after I clearly stated I have a BF of 3 1/2 years... So sometimes I get confused when guys talk to me because I feel like no one really notices me so when they say"yeah I've noticed you" I'm like whaaaa? Haha. And I love to be a social butterfly Smiley Happy in a good whySmiley Happy my BF knows that and I've made sure he shouldn't feel like anyone is going to steal me away. He's not to social so he over thinks stuff and get jealous. For a while it was pretty bad but we have been working on itSmiley Happy

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I agree, you don't want to assume the worst with every guy you meet. However, when someone gets your number without asking and then texts you and starts with you're beautiful, and he then proceeds to call/text three times, I think you can assume he's interested in you. I'd do my best to make it clear ASAP that you're happily in a relationship already. And really make it clear, because guys can really be dumb sometimes. 

 

Btw, you probably have a way on your phone to look at call history. Look at outgoing calls you probably have one to the number he then texted you from. It would be the easiest way to retain your number. And seriously, if he called his own phone, he did it to get your number, since he certainly couldn't have answered it!

 

I expect he'll be in touch again soon. I'd find a way to make sure he knows that you already have a boyfriend. 

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Completely agree with Mafan Smiley Happy

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

He didn't ask you for your number... he took it without your permission - SUPER CREEPY!

 

Also, if it's something that you don't feel comfortable telling your boyfriend then perhaps it's something that you shouldn't be doing. 

 

This is coming from a woman with more guy friends than I can count. But you better believe my husband knows about all of them and I am more than forthcoming about communication I've had with them.

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Ditto! 

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Thanks for the advice!

i wasn't going to hide it from him at all I just wanted some input from you gals at the same time. I wasn't sure how to handle it at all. The last time I told my bf he got upset at me instead of the guy which upset me because I took the time to talk to him and wasn't out of line at all.the guy was.

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

And that guy I had to remove former social networks by my self because he made me uncomfortable. The worste part was that my professor kept putting us in the same group to work. I was so relieved when that class ended! as a kid I had an issue with a boy that has stayed in my mind and made me uneasy at times so I try not to over think things... I'm everywhere with this post..

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I don't mean to sound morbid or pessimistic when it comes to evaluating people, but please be careful with people who express that kind of behavior (tricking you to get your number; calling you, even after you said you have a boyfriend, and not offering any explanation for that). If you suspect that you boyfriend might get jealous, chances are you subconsciously feel that this guy's intentions are far from being your chat-buddy. 

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Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

This is exactly where my mind went, sounds a little intrusive and manipulative.

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

True! I always get your too nice blah.. But I over think it or didn't think at all.

sorry this topic was way off Topic.

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

What a creepy and intrusive way to get your number! He didn't ask, he TOOK it, I wouldn't trust this guys boundary issues!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

 I feel like crapp. I shouldn't be so dumb&&nice. I never had that happen though. but I did feel like he took my number and should of went with my first gut feeling. Thanks gals!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

You just have to **bleep** in in the bud ASAP.  I agree that he took your number instead of asking for it......even if he really was shy and didn't mean that maliciously, you did tell him you have a BF and that alone should have made him back off and not call/text you....that right there proves he isn't so nice (or isn't so shy, either).  

 

I once had a guy come up to me in college and ask for my number and when I said I had a BF he said "it didn't matter".  I was disgusted.  

 

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I'm with Hellocoffee on this! A nice guy would NEVER chase another guys girl!!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Can you just block him? Just tell him "I'm sorry, my boyfriend didn't care for me getting texts from someone he doesn't know" if he balks at that sweetly ask if he would like to meet you bf! What a CREEP!!!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

I had something similar happen when I was in college, thinking someone was trying to just be friendly but then it getting sorta creepy when I had a boyfriend.  I didn't want to be mean, but ... sometimes you just have to be, and I think this is one of those times.  You need to be very direct and say "I have a boyfriend and this is making me feel very uncomfortable.  Please stop."  If he's a decent guy, he will do so.  If he's not, then you want as far away from him as possible!

Re: What to do when a guy is interested in you but you have a BF. Random.

Good point! Put your own safety first over the possibility of hurting someone's feelings. 

 

That's why I don't get into elevators with men alone. I wait and take the next elevator, or I step out. 

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