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Post in Besides Beauty

Too much perfume...

I have no problem speaking my mind in public or to strangers, but for the life of me cannot bring myself to tell someone they have bad breath or are wearing too much perfume. 

 

Would you tell someone that they are wearing too much perfume or cologne? A friend, family member, coworker or stranger? Have you done it and what was their reaction?

Re: Too much perfume...

That's always kinda tough. I have really bad allergies so if someone is wearing TOO much of the 'wrong' blend of notes I will usually distance myself to avoid an attack. I personally find it a bit rude to wear too much or even spray perfume in an area in which you work with a lot of others. People have allergies and asthma.

 

I think a polite way to go about doing it in a work setting is to have a manager send out an email that is a friendly 'reminder'. Friends and family members are a completely different ball park though! I do find that 'want a piece' for gum or mints can sometimes help, as most people won't turn that down. 

Whimsically yours,
Janine

Re: Too much perfume...

I would have no problem telling a friend or family member, "Ooh, that's a bit strong today!" in the same tone as if pointing out any other wardrobe malfunction.  No offense has ever been taken - quite the opposite, in fact.

 

Never had to deal with a fragrant coworker, but having management deal with it sounds like the best solution.

Re: Too much perfume...

I love my perfume but I'm cautious about how much I wear. 

 

I used to live in San Francisco and folks have no problem getting in your face there about things like that. Plus I've had friends that were really sensitive to scents -- some with allergies.

 

I mainly wear it for myself anyway so I don't care if others can't smell it as long as I can faintly smell it. 

 

Bad breath is a tough one. Unless it's a friend. I offer a mint or gum and if they refuse I'll say "are you sure" to try and drop the hint that they need it. That usually does the trick. 

Re: Too much perfume...

I don't mind people telling me NICELY. But if you're rude about it or accuse me of wearing something when it's NOT me wearing it.. yeah not cool!

 

I've jokingly asked people "wow you must love that scent you put the whole bottle one" as a nice way to say something. I don't have allergies but when I worked in a Sephora store and my shift was on Fragrance? It was all bad and I had to constantly move away back to the color world to stop migraines. Smiley Sad 

Luv&Lipgloss, Diana

Re: Too much perfume...

I had to tell someone the next cubicle from me, as it was making me feel like I was going to be sick. I really stressed about saying something but had to. It went well.

 

Some people may not realize that in today's world many, many people have allergies or extreme sensitivities. When you're trapped in a plane, car, bus, office with overwhelming scent, it can cause a real reactions that can take hours, or even a day to overcome. I know a growing number of people, plus I am more sensitive than I used to be.

Re: Too much perfume...

I'm terrible about telling people they're wearing too much perfume/cologne... as in, I tell people probably too often! A couple months ago I had a woman in front of me on a plane from Cleveland to Los Angeles and she DOUSED herself in freaking Opium from YSL (one of the most potent fragrances on the planet). My coughs and gagging noises were enough to send the hint. I honestly couldn't help it though, I tend to gag around even subtle fragrances these days. I only typically  complain/say something/act obnoxious to copious amounts of fragrance in close quarters.

Re: Too much perfume...

I would be comfortable to tell close friends or family, especially because I would expect the same from them if they see anything wrong with me.

 

I have a friend that doesn't let me wear specific perfumes when I meet her, she is very sensitive, and although I am very proud of my perfume choices, I don't take it personally.

 

 

Re: Too much perfume...

I can't bring myself to tell people they smell bad, and it's terrible! For too much perfume, I can say something like "nice perfume! I like perfumes too, altho my taste is usually something lighter" etc for a subtle suggestion/reminder. But really, there's no good way to tell someone they smell bad.

 

When I was in college I was working on the same project with this very nice guy....who shower every week? maybe? he smell like sweaty athletic clothe left to stew for weeks. I can somehow manage during meeting by getting up/walk around to "demonstrate" things, but there were a couple times where he came and sat beside me during lunch. I WAS DYING but I just couldn't say "dude! You stink!" right there in front of everyone and it would be rude to get up immediately since I just started my lunch. My method was count to 10 inside while shifting my food around, then when 10 seconds up I pretend I suddenly remembered this meeting I have to go to, then take the long way and go somewhere far far away to finish my lunch. X.X

Re: Too much perfume...

I hate when men wear a ridiculous amount of cologne or women wear too much perfume. I still don't have the guts to tell them it's enough to give someone a mile away a headache.

Re: Too much perfume...

Ok, the perfect place to vent about this!

 

There's a woman supervisor at work that wears an insane amount of perfume.  What's even more intoxicating is that it clashes with something she wears in her hair.  You can smell the scents long after she's been in a conference room, the elevator, etc.  I passed her one day and the scent was so strong it actually made me cough as she went past me (It was an actual reflex sort of cough, wasn't trying to exaggerate).  I would like to tell her sort of "woman to woman" because she might not know it's so strong but I don't know how to go about it since she's a supervisor and I'm an underling (not hers though). :/

Re: Too much perfume...

I haven't but I wish I could. Getting in the car with my grandma is suffocating.

Also, my middle school principal would wear so much perfume, we would smell her before we'd hear her coming through the gym.

Re: Too much perfume...

I just had a woman come into my Pure Barre studio who smelled like she must have used an entire bottle of (terrible) perfume right before. My whole body seized up as soon as she walked in, as a defense mechanism! I had to spend the next 20 minutes face to face with her explaning what the technique was and giving her details on our schedule & retail, all the while trying to not to choke, by breathing as little as possible! I could taste her perfume for hours. Yuck, yuck, yuck! 

I would have no problem telling a friend (nicely), but it's a difficult thing to say to a stranger. People should really be mindful though because it is extremely offensive...!

Re: Too much perfume...

I have a friend that has a little carrying case with calling cards in it (kind of like business cards but not) and he has some pre-printed cards for a few different things. One of them is, "I'm sure you're not aware of this but your lovely fragrance is a bit strong." (He also has, "Excuse me sir but it appears you forgot a zipper." I'm sure there are others in his little kit but I've never asked to paw through them.)  

There isn't really a polite way to tell someone that they stink but I've also noticed the problem seems to be getting worse. At my doctor's office today, a nurse opened the door to call a name and I could smell her perfume across the waiting room. Not good!  Perfume is supposed to be personal which is part of why it's a traditional romantic gift; like underwear and detailed, delicate jewelry it's most enjoyed by those who are welcomed into your personal space. There is no polite way to inform someone you can see their underwear, either. Smiley Happy 

Re: Too much perfume...

Did he just subtly give the cards to people and walk away?

Re: Too much perfume...

Yes, that's exactly how he handles it. Most people when handed a card in a subtle way will walk away, as well, and then start reading it. Like passing your friend a note in the hallway. It probably comes off better when he does it because he's always very dapper and generally looks friendly, so it feels more like a friend telling you that thing everyone but you knows for your benefit rather than a stranger shouting, "hey, take a bath!" (my father's approach to the problem.) 

Re: Too much perfume...

Well that is very nice of him!

Re: Too much perfume...

There's no way to do it politely.  I'm not exactly the nicest person, but I do strive to never be rude, at least not purposely, so I've never told someone they didn't smell perfect, and I also never wrinkle my nose/make a face anywhere said person could see, either.  That said, if I'm close to said person and know she might respond well, I would have no problem giving a reminder.  People I might give a reminder to are always ones grateful for the notice.

 

Once, I had my boss come into my office asking if I smelled roses.  He did say it smelled nice, but boy was I mortified.  It was my body wash, not even perfume I sprayed on.  It was my favourite body wash, but I never bought another bottle.

Re: Too much perfume...

I get BAD migraines from some scents and if it's too much. I had to go to HR for a co-worker once. Told him many times and one time had to go to the ER to get a shot and he still continued. 

HR was the last resort since my manager spoke with him about it and he still refused. 

Re: Too much perfume...

That's crazy! I wonder if he was just stubborn or he thought his cologne was "sexy".

Re: Too much perfume...

If it was a friend or family member I would tell them for sure. I have told my friend many times her perfume is too strong but she doesn't really seem to care or listen. Having that said I only have a few friends I talk to and we are pretty close, and I only talk to my parents. For coworkers, I would probably offer them a mint and eat one myself if they had bad breath. If their perfume was consistently way too strong I might try and mention how I am sensitive to perfume and see where the conversation goes. If a stranger had bad breathe I don't think I'd say anything but if they had strong smelling perfume and I was forced to be near them I'd tell them probably. It annoys me so much if someone wears strong perfume to university and makes everyone around them suffer, so I have no problem telling them it is too strong and that they aren't suppose to be wearing perfume anyway in class.

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