Valentine's Day gifts--are they just for the women?

[punctuationgeek]

Recently, I was discussing Valentine's Day with someone who asked, "Are girls supposed to get gifts for their boyfriends, or do only girls get gifts?" Never having had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day, I had no idea.

One of my friends, to my knowledge, doesn't get her fiance anything for Valentine's Day--yet last year, he got a nice hotel room, flowers, took her to dinner, and proposed. This year, another friend is taking her boyfriend out to an expensive dinner, bought herself some sexy lingerie to wear--and, as her boyfriend didn't get her anything for Christmas, I'm guessing he won't get her anything for Valentine's Day.

So what's the protocol for Valentine's Day gifts--or is there a protocol at all? Do you get your significant other a gift on Valentine's Day? Do you expect to get something--even if you didn't get your SO a gift?

[martinwayne]

Valentine's Day gift-giving customs vary widely and are not restricted to any one gender. Traditionally, men often present gifts to women, but it's increasingly common for women to give gifts to their male partners as well. The key is to understand the preferences and expectations within your own relationship. Some couples exchange gifts, others may not, and for some, gestures like planning a special dinner or spending quality time together are more meaningful than physical gifts ikore.co.uk. Ultimately, there's no strict protocol; it's about how you and your partner choose to express love and appreciation for each other on this day.

cnetsoeducation.com

[ZyonAries]

Valentine's Day gift-giving can vary widely based on personal preferences and cultural norms. There isn't a strict protocol, but here are some insights that might help navigate this situation. Valentine's Day traditionally involves the exchange of gifts between partners as a way to express affection. Both genders can give and receive gifts. It's not limited to just one gender giving gifts. The approach to gift-giving can differ between couples. Some might exchange elaborate presents, while others prefer smaller gestures or experiences. Communication between partners is key to understanding each other's expectations. 
https://smamepestimate.com/

[Nortyl]

I always present my partner with a gift on this day. This year I decided to buy something expensive and memorable as we also had a 5-year anniversary the next day. Having looked through the various forums and blogs, I was lucky to find the guys from bigwatchbuyers.com that sell watches in New York. So, I bought a luxury watch for my husband. He liked the gift a lot and it was a great pleasure to see him happy.

[Pillialle]

Valentine's Day is traditionally associated with romantic gestures and gift-giving, and while it is often assumed that gifts are primarily for women, they are not exclusively for them. Valentine's Day is an opportunity for couples to express their love and appreciation for each other, regardless of gender.

In fact, men may enjoy receiving Valentine's Day gifts just as much as women do.

[Anastasiya13]

I dont think it's a thing just for women. I get my boyfriend a gift too, because it's a day of just extra appreciation and should be for both. I even get my mom a gift too. 

[CorgiMommy]

I always give my husband something for Valentine's Day.   It is a day to show your love and appreciation for your spouse/boy or girlfriend etc.   It doesn't have to be expensive just something meaningful or something they really need.  Or doesn't even have to be a gift .  You can cook them their favorite meal,  go see their favorite sports team, go to the movies, do a chore for them they hate to do etc.

[ladymeag]

The best way to make sense of it when someone says something like this: what would happen if you were both ladies or both men? 

It's usually called "exchanging gifts" - which implies that both parties have something to give. So, no, I don't think it's really Ladies Get Free Stuff Day. To each their own in adult relationships, of course, but I'd say the default should be golden-rule style, if you want gifts you should give them. 

[stephyd216]

I always get my hubby something on Valentine's Day, even when we were just dating! I honestly can't think of a time where one person bought a gift and the other didn't? I fee like that would create a really awkward situation in a relationship...

[punctuationgeek]

The friend I mentioned in my post (the one who didn't get anything for Christmas) and her boyfriend actually broke up after Christmas--but got back together a few weeks later. In my opinion, the Christmas gift situation had a little bit to do with it.

I think it would definitely be awkward--I've seen people go through the I-got-you-something-and-you-didn't-get-me-anything problem with their boyfriends, and it always ends with someone being bitter, angry, and angry-Facebook-posting. Because if you're mature enough to be in a serious relationship, posting passive aggressive Facebook statuses is normal *rolls eyes*

[katie1724]

I think -- if you choose to celebrate Valentine's day with your valentine -- then both should get a gift, or no gifts should be exchanged. It really depends on whether you as a couple are on the same page about it (maybe one person doesn't want a gift?), but for me, I don't think it should be a question of gender.

[lilyyy]

Your first friend shouldn't be surprised when her fiance finds someone that treats him better.

[BrennaBombshell]

I honestly just love any excuse for presents! I bought my boyfriend of two years a video game he's been wanting, and he's taking me out to a nice dinner. But I'm the kind of person who gives gifts just "because it's Wednesday, so why not?" So it may not be the norm. I'd say at least a card would be sweet though. 🙂

[pinkonyx]

Yes! Always! I love my man, and he's my valentine. 

[infinitise]

With Korean people, 

Valentines day is the day the girl give the guy something (handmade chocolate or perfume,etc) 

and White day (April 14th) is when the guy gives the girl something 

some people go by this, or I have a few friends who both give and receives..

[sn22]

@punctuationgeek we seem to be on the same wavelength. I came on here to post what everyone got for their SO for Valentines, but I guess you beat me to the punch. LOL 

And I think the men deserve some gifts too. 

[Anonymous]

sometimes i do, most of the time i don't, he doesn't expect anything from me on valentines day because he thinks it's a "girl's day". but i get him nice gifts for our anniversary, father's day , Christmas and his birthday.

Btw i do expect to get a Valentine gift even if i don't get him anything, because i earned it. lol

[crayzeeRN]

I am a very gender-equality type of person. If I go on dates, I am not ok with the guy paying all of the time. I don't think there's anything wrong with a guy showering his girl with gifts, or a girl showering their guy with gifts, but I think it should be reciprocal and not always one person being showered while the other receives nothing. In past relationships, I've always gotten something for my SO and received something as well. More fun if you share the love:) 

[punctuationgeek]

Completely agree! I've contributed some money to every date I've been on--if the guy pays for dinner, I'll pay the tip. I think, however, that both parties need to be on the same page when it comes to the level of gift giving. I had a friend who thought she and her boyfriend were much more serious than they were; for Christmas, she gave him a gift that cost at least $200, he gave her nothing. I agree about sharing the love--I'd feel a bit weird receiving a gift from a guy without giving him something too.