JChristina19

My Story...On Beauty.

I'm 16 years young and I'm in high school. I've been using make-up since I was 12. I'm really enthusiastic outside, but on the inside I'm just dying of sadness. I usually get comments saying I'm really perky and energtic, but this is my darker side. And I would like to share it with all of you. This is what really grinds my gears sometimes...

 

I am still experimenting with make-up right?? Becasue I just love it!! And it's like people are judging me and my looks before they really get to know me. I am a very open-minded person, but it's like people don't want to see beyond my foundation, blush, primer, eyeliner, and everything else. That's why I feel really isolated and alone all the time. I do have close friends, but I haven't really found anyone with this passion I have. It's so hard. I've been dealing with depresion and bi polar disorder for the past 2 years. I've become a completely different person, regarding looks, personality, and my perspective of my life and the world. My parents don't understand that I wear make-up becasue I'm so self-conscious. I'm self-conscious becasue I'm a pretty curvy girl, even though a lot of people compliment on my looks, calling me beautiful. But how come I don't feel that way? I'm curvy and so what?! I don't need to be crazy skinny in order to look good in clothes from Urban Planet or Aeropostale. That's the problem with society. I wish people would be a litle more sensitive...even with me. It's really difficult having to cope with people who are so biased of me, wearing make-up and having this grudge (which I don't know) against me. I am probably only one of the 5 girls in my school who is high maintenance with make-up. I've been told that make-up enhances your beauty and your features and not add beauty. I've been told that make-up is a type of politeness and class and ethic and respect. How come I don't feel that way about it either and feel like a freak when I am the only on the the room who wears make-up? It makes me upset. And I'm crying just writing this. :smileysad:

 

I really would like to thank all of you beauty gals for making me feel welcome here and OK about wearing make-up becasue I feel like you guys are my friends and family, giving me such great advice and talking with me about our obsessions. It's great. And thanks for reading my story and connecting with me. It really means the world to me. :smileyhappy: 

 

xoxo,

JChristinaC19 <3

rikkie

Re: My Story...On Beauty.

Don't let their comments get to you, honestly, everyone has things that they are insecure about, that it feels like EVERYONE else notices and must talk about when you're not around. Often it's something other people only notice if they see you're insecure about it and draw attention to it yourself. And high school is just a difficult thing, you have so many people all stuck together in one place, still trying to figure out who they are.

 

You usually can't do that until you have a chance to explore the world outside your school and group of classmates you might have known for quite some time. Never mind the fact that everyone is still growing up, some people are much more mature by this point than others, so they can't always relate to how you feel because they're not there yet. It's hard enough for lots of people even without the added burden of depression on top of things. Some people will be lucky enough to never experience the feelings you're dealing with now, so they may never understand how hard it can be. If they tell you you're pretty as you are and don't NEEEED makeup, it's usually their way of trying to help you feel better, but they don't or can't realize that it leaves you feeling misunderstood and more conflicted. The only opinion that matters is your own! If you feel more powerful and confident with makeup and you enjoy wearing it because it's fun and makes you happy, then rock it! I bet later on when other girls are trying to learn how to do makeup properly they will be singing a different tune! 

BeautyJunkie325

Re: My Story...On Beauty.

I was the smart curvy girl with glasses in high school. Since I was smart and not stick thin like the rest of the girls I went to school with I was terribly shy and self-conscious. So wearing make-up was self-defense. I was bullied by a girl who lived across the street from me, she picked on me at school, she would have parties at her house and TP my trees. My all-time favorite was when she and a group of her friends wrote slurs all over my dad's truck with lip liner, lipstick & eye liners. It was a living nightmare. As much as my parents wanted to help and understand, they really couldn't. As a result, I ended up more shy and withdrawn, which made things worse. Add to all of that the normal teenage angst & I have no idea how my poor parents made it through.

 

It took me a long time to realize and decide that what others say or think about you isn't important. When I was younger and my mom would tell me that things would get better I totally didn't believe her. Now I know it does, you just have to be strong enough to hold you head up and do what makes you happy. I wear make-up to enhance the things I love about me, I wear clothes that make me feel pretty and I wear shoes/jewelry that makes me feel polished and put together. If wearing make-up makes you happy, then you should wear it and hold you head high. I agree with tashalicious, the person pointing is the person who is feeling the most inadequate.  It's just sad that the only way they can build themselves up it to tear someone else down. That is the truth at 16, 21 and even 40.  You just need to be true to you and ignore the voices of everyone else. Once you do that everything else seems to fall into place.  Big Hugs!

glossyguru

Re: My Story...On Beauty.

I'm sorry :smileysad:

 

I thought I would tell you a story of how I can relate, maybe it will make you feel better? I'm 14 and I wear makeup to school. People at my school do wear makeup, but only eye makeup. I wear my face makeup as well, and people used to always make fun of me for covering myself. For some reason, they thought that if someone was wearing foundation, they were trying to be too perfect. But people just don't understand.

 

Makeup gives you confidence. And if people are still willing to make fun of you and how you look and how you are, then that's their problem. If they are so focused on bringing you down when you just want to feel better and prettier, then they aren't even worth it. I know it's hard, but what I did was stopped caring. I always told myself that these people won't even matter when we graduate. 

 

Even though I wasn't depressed and had bi polar disorder, I hope that I could relate enough to help you.

 

But one last piece of advice: grab some tissues, and buy yourself something nice. I ALWAYS feel better when I have something new in my hand.

tashalicious

Re: My Story...On Beauty.

Don't worry too much about what the other kids say about you and the fact that you wear makeup, believe me, every kid in your school has something that they feel self conscious and alone about no matter how cool they try to act, often times when someone is pointing the finger at you its because they are trying to deflect attention away from their own feelings of inadequacy.

 

Don't let anybody dull your shine!

beautylovingirl

Re: My Story...On Beauty.

[ Edited ]

In reference to be "crazy skinny" I'm just gonna say this: Who's place is it to judge you and tell you how skinny you can be before your allowed to feel good?  In my opinion no one but you. You are your own person and honey throw the confidence out there like a 95 mile an hour fast ball. Seeing someone for who they are on the inside should always be seen first,but unfortunately that's not how society is and that's sad but personal outside beauty is always judged first and that's always how it is going to be. You should be your own person and stand up and be strong on any subjects that you don't agree with and let them  know how you feel,and as for makeup you make that your own no matter what anyone says if it makes you feel good to wear it, then wear it and have fun and make it your own. Beauty has alot of  definitions and you as a person should let no one define you because deep down I know your a beautiful person and I'm sure that shines through everyday.:heart:

 

I'm a smaller person and I love wearing makeup, although I don't have your situations to deal with I'm still a strong stand up defining person on how I feel and that makes me the individual I am. Stay Strong and avoid the negativity sweetie girl, some of those not so nice comments come from people who may not feel so good about themselves and criticizing you is the only way they know to make themselves feel better. Your always a beautiful person inside and out when your here with us.

 

Just carry our thoughts with you through out they day and know you have a huge group of friends who love you just the way you are!

 

BIG HUUUUUGS!

 

prettyinpa

Re: My Story...On Beauty.

Oh, JChristinaC19- don't let the words of small minded people affect how you feel about yourself. You are brave for putting up with all this and you shouldn't feel like a freak because you enjoy makeup. Some people are into sports, some are into music, some are into art, you are into makeup as an art form, and if they don't like it, they can lump it!
Call upon us anytime, we are here for you always.

 

Hugs!

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